Stay Reckless.

Title: Anchor
Author: nisacharakj 
Type and Genre: Het/Hurt/Comfort
Rating: G
Characters: Uchiha Shisui, Mitarashi Anko
Summary: An epidemic wipes out most of the young and old population in feudal Japan. Shisui and Anko deal with the loss of their second child.
Warnings: Infant death

They never really went back to the grave stone. They never really went back to the row of jizo lining that part of the cemetery. The number of jizo had grown that summer, all thanks to the famine and the epidemic that swept through the land at the time.

Well, they were still in the throes of it.

It’s only been a month, just barely four weeks, and the pain was still so raw. It came about as numbness at first that continued on for the first two weeks or so. And then it was the emptiness that crept up on them and made itself so painfully conspicuous. Sometimes when it rained outside and the wind was strong and it rattled the wood and shook the trees, Shisui thought he could hear her tiny voice: her weak little cry that, despite how small it was, was a comfort during a time when they always checked in on her just to make sure she was still breathing. Sometimes it sounded so real he would go in and look, slide the fusuma a crack and peer in, only to find the room empty and strewn with scrolls and ink stands and other paperwork. Sometimes the room would just be as empty as ever, tatami mats lining the floor and nothing else placed on it anywhere. Either way, he would be always reminded of her absence and the sound of her little voice would seem clearer in his head than ever that it would refuse to go away for days.

Nanami seemed to catch on as well, though she was still too little to understand what it really was that was going on. All she knew was that she’d had a little sister for all of a week and a half before she ‘went away’ to where the baby cherry blossoms grew. Anko’s clinging to her at all times, the extreme reactions when Nanami would go quiet while she played, when she tripped and fell, when she even looked in the direction of the fire, when she was held so tight at night—Shisui watched as the girl grew to doubt her every move for fear of upsetting her mother. She didn’t understand; she was too little to understand why adults acted the way they did. She didn’t understand why, that instead of crying when they were sad, they thought she would run away or do something horrible to herself. And Anko had closed herself off to Shisui trying to tell her that she was hurting more than helping—and he understood that she didn’t really need that right now.

At dinner that night, he couldn’t help but let his gaze wander over her, falling to her obi, now tight around her belly where she’d once carried their daughter. Only just over a month ago. Only just, and they’d been worried and she’d said she felt like something was wrong, but he’d put his hands on her and felt the little kicks from within and he’d told her that it felt stronger than the last time… They had allowed themselves to hope. Too much, apparently. And now it was flat, her obi tied neatly, and inside—empty.

The emptiness crept up on them in all the wrong places.

Dinner was a silent affair, quite unlike how dinner usually was. Neither of them ate much (and they haven’t been, this past month), and Shisui had to reach over a few times to squeeze her hand to remind her she still had food on her plate. Anko would pick at her food in response, uninterested. It was in moments like these that she wished he’d just leave her alone. Closed off to the world in the moment, she just wanted him to shut up and quit worrying about her.

And somewhere in the loud silence came a baby’s cry: a neighbor taking a stroll with their little one, letting it get a bit of fresh air because that’s what they’d been told—to make sure the children got plenty of fresh air to strengthen their lungs. The epidemic weakened them so.

It lasts for all of two minutes, and he doesn’t even notice that he’d been staring past the shoji in the direction of the baby’s voice all that time. When the crying finally fades into a distance where silence creeps over them again, Shisui finally tears his eyes away to look at his plate. “The fish is good.” It’s a bland comment, but it’s the most he’s said all day to her. “If there is more tomorrow, we should make some tomorrow night as well. Before the season is over.”

But all he’s met with is more silence, and Shisui has come to accept it, though he looks up at her as if to try and discern some sort of answer from her expression anyway. …But her expression has nothing to do with fish or dinner or small talk. It’s all pain and anguish and rage and frustration and hurt all mixed into one and trying so hard to break past the stony mask that was trying to shield her away from the reality of it all.

And he notices the dark patches on her kimono, spreading bigger by the second, and Shisui heart nearly shatters. Their child may be no more, but she was still a mother. Her body still refused to accept what her mind was trying so hard to do. It reacted as it normally would, letting her milk down at the mere sound of a baby’s cry. And he knows she hasn’t nursed in all of a month and he knows it probably hurt…

Hurt in all the ways he could only imagine.

His chopsticks clatter against his plate as he scrambles towards her about the same time she abruptly stands and tries to get away. And when he catches her and presses her face to his chest, she’s already screaming—screaming into the folds of his yukata, literally fighting him.

But it’s the first time she’s done this since their baby’s passing and he doesn’t want her to do this alone. He doesn’t want her to do this alone any more.

So he holds on, tighter than ever, his tears making the fabric on the shoulders of her kimono darker.

And her screams have died down to an agonized keening. He can feel her fingers twisting in his yukata, almost tearing as she tugged and pulled and pushed him away all at once. He can feel her try to punch him, pull at his hair, do anything. Anything.

Until she stops.

And she holds him just as tight as he was holding her, holds him as she remembers that he’s the only constant in her life to date that has proved time and again to always, always return to her. An anchor.

And for a fleeting moment she wonders why it never hit her before, why it never came to her in the hours she’d been at her lowest. It’s all it takes. It makes it all the more easier to let it all down, to let the walls down in front of him and pull him into the grief that wracked her.

And she finds that she can let him hold her up… that he wouldn’t let her fall.

More icons by yours truly :)

Total Icon Count: 5

Teasers:

Please credit nisacharakj if using!

Title: Secret Admirer Part 1/2
Author: nisacharakj
Type and Genre: Yaoi/Romance/Humor
Rating: NC-17
Characters: Uchiha Itachi, Uchiha Shisui
Summary: Itachi has a secret admirer and Shisui is less than thrilled.
Warnings: Nothing too bad here, but pointless smut ahead.

He’d noticed it that first day he’d come home and thanked Shisui for the bouquet of flowers.

“Thank you for the flowers.” Still smiling to himself, working on undoing the buttons on the cuffs of his shirt. Still reveling in the attention, too, apparently. Work had been uncharacteristically great. Perhaps the flowers were to blame, but they sure did lift his mood some.

He’d only said he liked flowers in passing; Itachi never really expected Shisui to follow through, especially because Shisui didn’t seem like the type to buy flowers and chocolates and call him home for a candlelit dinner with champagne and the whole shebang. Shisui was that person who listened and smiled and gave no indication that he had plans up his sleeve, and when in passing Itachi would tell him his favorite book as a child was Moby Dick (and he’d laugh and say it wasn’t his favorite story by a long shot, and Itachi would purse his lips and tell him he never expected it to be) he’d surprise him about a year later with an authentic first edition copy of it with the publication date an unbelievable 1851.

Shisui didn’t do flowers or candlelit dinners or roses on the bed. He took Itachi running along the seaside just so he could have a nice helping of soft serve and dip his toes in the water afterwards. He made caramel popcorn and chocolate truffles and pot after pot of tea when Itachi told him he had to work late. He picked up Itachi’s laundry and took care of dinner just so Itachi could have time to sleep. He even forwarded subscription emails about discounts on pajamas or sweaters.

 

( Read more... )

 

Title: Nightmares
Author: nisacharakj
Type and Genre: Shonen Ai; Hurt/Comfort
Rating: G
Characters: Uchiha Sasuke, Uchiha Shisui
Summary: Sasuke is having a nightmare; Shisui offers comfort.
Warnings: --
Notes: Based on an AU rp in which Sasuke is deaf/blind and also aquaphobic.

His assignment lay forgotten in a slew of papers strewn all over the floor amidst a collection of open books, all dealing with ornithology. The laptop screen was blank, only the orange light on its side blinking in sleep mode. Half reclining, half seated, one leg bent at the knee and the other almost falling off the edge of the couch, Shisui dozed on. His head rested lightly against the backrest of the couch. Perhaps it had been a bad idea to pick the couch to study if he was only going to fall asleep at the drop of a hat; he needed to get things done by the end of week, and since the events that had unfolded six weeks ago, Shisui had been trying not to drown under the backlog of work that had accumulated.

But juggling work and academics in addition to taking care of his traumatized cousin was looking to be a tad more than he could handle. Not that he’d ever admit it, of course. But with the number of days he’s gone without food or sleep or even brushing his hair or changing out of his pajamas, it wasn’t looking too good. Today, however, he’d managed to remember to shower and get into clean clothes. After which he had done the laundry and sorted and ironed Sasuke’s clothes—plus the few items of his that he’d managed to wash as well. Perhaps it was because he was clean today that sleep felt like it couldn’t escape him. So much so that Shisui, who was usually alert enough to notice even from all the way in the living room when Sasuke stopped moving around in his bed and finally fell asleep, didn’t really hear him whimper.

Fluff, however—she’d padded over to Shisui and at first, nuzzled his hand. There hadn’t really been any response. Not even when she’d whined, then whined a little louder.

It’s been a minute since. Sasuke’s still stirring in bed, broken syllables leaving his lips every now and then. Fluff needed Shisui awake. Now.

Eventually, the dog reaches up, paws on the edge of the seat as she pressed her cold, wet snout up against Shisui’s cheek.

“Huh what?!” Of course, that does the trick.

He’s wiping his face and the sleep out of his eyes simultaneously, still in a daze as to where he was and what just happened. There’s a yip from the goldie sitting next to him, thumping her tail on the floor. An urgent little yip.

Shisui groans, closing his laptop and letting it slide off his lap and onto the cushions.

“Mrnn. What is it, girl?” And she’s up, paws shuffling on the floor, signaling that he was needed in Sasuke’s room right away—that something wasn’t right with Sasuke.

It’s enough to have Shisui bolting upright. “What’s wrong?” But she’s padding towards the room, and Shisui is all but running.

“Sasuke?”

It’s not like he can hear him, but Shisui doesn’t care right now. All he can see is his little cousin in distress. Still dreaming, but still in distress. Whimpering in his sleep like the worst was happening to him, like he was in some far off place and nothing was happy.

And Shisui knew exactly where he was—back in that river, holding on for dear life as the current tried to take him.

“Sasuke…” It’s murmured as he slides into bed behind him, arms coming to wrap around him in an embrace. Shisui pulls himself closer, an arm across Sasuke’s chest, the gesture protective. “I’m so sorry…”

He was. It had been his fault for leaving Sasuke alone and taking his word that he’d stay put until he returned from class that day. If anything, Shisui should have just taken him to class with him. And now—

The whimpers and the struggles cease, however, and Sasuke reaches up to rest his hands on Shisui’s arm. He isn’t alone, he realizes. He isn’t drowning; he could still breathe. Someone’s got him. Shisui’s got him.

Sasuke feels his cousin nuzzle at his ear, warm breath fanning his neck—enough to lull him back to sleep, his heartbeat slowing down once more to something calmer.

Shisui smiles, mostly in relief, and presses a chaste kiss to the back of Sasuke’s neck. A little gesture that was more familial than anything. –And he reaches his free arm over to Fluff, who settles on the other side and brings her big fluffy head to rest atop Sasuke. Shisui pets it, smiling at her.

“Good girl.”

A few Shisui icons for RP purposes. This set also includes battle icons and jutsu-related icons, because I figured that was missing a lot from most RP icons. [[For personal use]]

Art credit goes to Maligned Affairs (go check out all her art and doujinshi, they are aMAAAAZING!), mornesonge, and zombigfish. Also that one icon everybody has a variation of-- by Lily ♥

Total Icon Count: 28

Please credit nisacharakj if using!

Title: After Hours
Author: nisacharakj 
Type and Genre: Yaoi; Humor/Romance
Rating: M
Characters: Uchiha Shisui, Uchiha Itachi
Summary: The same rules apply after hours at the pool: no running, no diving, and no horseplay. But what about tossing your boyfriend's shorts out?
Warnings: --



When Itachi reached the edge of the pool, Shisui was already standing closer to the deep end, up to his chest in water. The lights were out and all he could make out was the other man’s silhouette, soft lights from the hotel rooms illuminating the pool in places. The underwater lights lent a greenish hue to the water. It was eerily quiet, save for the splashing coming from Shisui’s direction.

Itachi dipped a toe in the water that had run off the sides and collected on the tile surrounding the pool. It was cold, and he pulled a face.

“I can’t believe you dragged me out in the middle of the night to go swimming.” It was mumbled as Itachi shuffled towards the metal bars that indicated a ladder. He gripped both bars before sending Shisui a glare.

Shisui grinned from his spot, arms casually draped across the edge of the pool while he leaned against the cool tile. “Technically, I didn’t. You came out here all by yourself.”

“Because you asked me to.”

“You had a choice.”

Itachi only sighed in response, bracing himself for the shock of cold as he stepped into the water, gripping onto the metal railing tightly, as if that would make the water temperature more bearable. “No, I didn’t.”

“Oh come on.”

“You threatened to sing on stage tomorrow at breakfast.”

( Get your toes wet~ )

Title: Santa Likes Cheeseburgers
Author: nisacharakj 
Type and Genre: Het; Humor/Romance
Rating: G
Characters: Uchiha Shisui, Temari
Summary: A six year old runs away from home on Christmas day because Santa doesn't exist. [The original prompt said day after Christmas, but I'm a dork and never realized it till I went back and checked things after writing it all. Oops.]
Warnings: --

“Grabbing lunch, Uchiha?”

“Yep!”

“Alright, see you in a bit!”

“See ya!”

So it had snowed in last night. Shisui weighed his options: to eat out or to finish his sandwich? A glance around the hospital suggested that eating inside wouldn’t be much of an issue today; it was quiet all over, and most of the hospital staff have been given the day off, being Christmas and all. Even the emergency room wasn’t as busy as any other day. It was nice to know that people were actually making an effort to stay inside on a public holiday such as this, stay away from the roads or other obvious weather-related hazards. But there would always be a few who were having a heart attack or delivering a baby. That, however, was acceptable. Those were the tolerable cases. But getting slammed into a telephone pole and having to work around it while it’s still lodged in your chest? Definitely not something you’d want to see on Christmas day. And to top it all off, to see the doctors cover your five year old daughter’s body with a sheet and then wheel her off in a gurney…? That is the worst. Especially when you were the doctor trying to keep the father alive, but ends up losing both patients, just because one of them decided that life was not worth living for anymore.

It was the worst feeling, to watch a patient die. Whether they died after a tremendous fight to stay alive or if they died because they gave up the choice to live in the end—he didn’t know which was worse. It would always be just as bad, he supposed. And it would always leave him feeling numb and shattered till time gave him the strength to push it completely aside and move on.

So it wasn’t hunger that urged him to step outside into the lobby that afternoon. It was simply the need to step out of the building for a breather, even if it he didn’t get any lunch. Lunch wasn’t the priority here, it never had been. He was usually good to go for a whole twenty four hours after breakfast—that was all the energy he needed in his caramel latte and pile of cinnamon buns, so it wasn’t like he was going to drop from exhaustion any time soon. But sweeping a glance outside once more from where he stood, all he saw was about a foot of snow, blinding white. He might have almost turned to get his sandwich, but the orderly wheeling off another gurney made him turn away from it and walk right up to the exit.

He really needed that breather.

Fresh air wasn’t going to do much, but there was an inexplicable sense of relief when he stepped outside anyway.

 

( Omnomnom )

Title: Economy Class
Author: nisacharakj 
Type and Genre: Het; Humor/Romance
Rating: T
Characters: Uchiha Shisui, Temari
Summary: A flight from Australia to France brings out the best, and the worst, in Shisui and Temari
Warnings: --

Flying economy class was never a pleasant thing on long distance flights to halfway across the world. Flying halfway across the world itself was a chore. But Shisui had no choice. Or well, that’s what he told himself. He didn’t have to fly all the way to France for his vacation. Actually, that was Temari’s idea, so there really was no arguing in the end. She’d said she wanted to go to France, so they were going to France. No questions asked. The downside to this arrangement was that they couldn’t find two seats together, and the man in the middle seemed to be fast asleep from the get-go to even ask him if he’d mind shifting to either the aisle seat or the window one.

( Cute under the cut  )

Title: T.O.D (Time of Death)
Author: nisacharakj 
Type and Genre: Implied Yaoi; Hurt/Comfort/Character death
Rating: T
Characters: Uchiha Shisui, Uchiha Itachi
Summary: Itachi's days are numbered and the family awaits the inevitable
Warnings: Character death


Every day heard Shisui’s laughter ringing through the otherwise listless atmosphere that pervaded the house in the wake of the other’s passing—one that came by all too slowly, and yet too soon. For Itachi was only nineteen and Shisui was just making it to twenty one; there was still so much to do and still so much to try. They had hopes and dreams and a perfect future that, according to Shisui, would solve all the world’s problems—but time. Time seemed to have an agenda of its own, and all too soon they were left wondering how to make things come around, how to fit between the narrow lines, how to go on.

( We've stayed up longer )

As if the lack of warmth early that morning wasn’t enough. The first flash made him wince, but it was the second one that woke him up. That, and a little bundle of warmth tucked into his side. Then there was another flash and Shisui squinted into the light, turning his head in the direction of the flash, only to eventually make out Itachi’s face.

“Hey.” Itachi was holding a camera, he noted. And smiling.

“Morning.” Those smiles were so rare, they were always treasured. Perhaps today was a special day and Shisui had forgotten what it was supposed to be? He’d find out eventually, he figured, attempting to turn completely to face Itachi...

Shisui stopped.

Itachi smiled wider.

And Shisui was grinning from ear to ear.

“Why hello there, little man~” So he hadn’t forgotten Sasuke’s birthday after all.

Far from it.

Instead, tucked into his side was little Nao, all of three and a half months old, rather sleepy but also in the mood for an imaginary bicycle ride, what with those chubby little legs kicking up the blankets as they pushed imaginary pedals.

Nao cooed, and Shisui leaned in, peppering that rosy face with kisses till little hands came to grab his face and hold it there, regardless of all that early morning stubble that might have hurt them. Nao thought Shisui’s nose was tasty, and Shisui chuckled. The camera flashed again, and Itachi joined in the laughter.

There were more kisses, and Shisui took a moment to tickle that tummy. The cutest little squeal of laughter erupted then, and chubby legs kicked in the air. The camera flashed once more and Itachi rose from his spot, no longer kneeling by the bed, but sitting on it right next to their little bundle of cute. Shisui was already blowing raspberries on that little tummy and Nao would flail and laugh and squeal all at the same time.

And then he kicked Shisui in the face when his Daddy looked up to grin-- 

The camera flashed again and Nao blinked, little toes experimentally digging their way into Shisui’s mouth, trying to part those sealed lips.

It was an effort, and Nao squirmed, those barely-there eyebrows dipping as that little foot tried to pry open Daddy’s mouth. Shiny black eyes looked up to Dad for help, but Itachi wasn’t going to budge. “Ah?” Come on Dad, help me out here.

Itachi only smiled, and leaned in to kiss that little nose. Nope, no assistance, little man.

And so Nao tried harder, the tips of those tiny toes succeeding somewhat in their attempt to get inside Shisui’s mouth. It was all quiet effort until:

“….OMnomnomnommMM~!”

--And another squeal erupted in response as Shisui pretended to gobble up that little foot.

There was another flash, and more laughter.

Itachi had plenty of precious memories in this morning's collection to send home to Mikoto that weekend.